Sandwiches eeeeeeverywhere.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Got a text that the fed tax return dropped into my account just before getting on the first leg of my flights the Vegas. Fate? Viva Las Vegas!
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize
