there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
Please come pick me up? I sleep walked to planned parenthood again.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
It feels like the devil is humping my brain with his razor sharp erection.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm sorry I tried to spit drugs down your throat like a baby bird last night.
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
Randomize
