Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
third nipple confirmed
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
