I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
why does being broke make me substitute dinner for vodka, Xanax, and two day old cupcakes? I don't like being fat, jittery and drunk.
Of course she's mad at you. You Kanye Wested a picture of her catching snowflakes in her mouth. "imma let you finish but..." was the shaft and you put two of Kanye West's heads for the balls.
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
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