He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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