She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize