Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Oh no I would never do that to her. But when you're single again let me know. Cheating penis is definitely better than single penis. But she has claws.
Sunday Funday has been cancelled indefinitely, due to lack of self control of all parties involved.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Randomize
