is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
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