hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Drank for free all night and I'm not even sleeping w the bartender. What is this magic?
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
