Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
i cant even explain all the reasons why i dont want to fuck you right now.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Randomize