Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
You need Xanax blowdarts
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize
