And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I haven't been this unsober in a long time. I feel like I am observing myself. Like I am a test subject for alcohol. I wish my brain would shut up and let me be a normal drunk.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
PANTIES FOUND
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
