Reasons why i shouldn't be drunk and upset: i'm going to a boy's
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
Welp...herpes.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
Randomize