I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
I planned on emotionally scarring him for life this weekend. DAMN YOU PERIOD!
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
He wants another date...I mean he's cute, but I just am not ready to give up my glamorous single-girl lifestyle here.
you mean the one where you drink out of the carton and don't wear pants?
Yeah, and pee with the door open. It's the little things.
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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