she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
Randomize
