The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
man my uterus needs to drop the egg or GTFO, BUUUSHIT
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
