I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
im pretty sure you tried to fart so bad you accidently pissed your pants at my party.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
he made me have a moment of silence for the half of my ice cream cone i threw away.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
He just stared into my eyes and touched himself. That isn't hooking up.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
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