I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
She definitely pulled a diaper out of her purse and cleaned up the vodka with it, where do you meet these people?!
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize
