Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
My face is tingly. And my legs are being massaged by golden elves.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Why can't he just dump me? This is like a baby seal clubbing the hunter
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
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