Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
Apparently I blacked out and started wrestling with some dude last night. Just found out I might have dislocated his shoulder. Best part: he still wants to bone me
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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