There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Yeah? Well I'm currently predrinking downstairs in my room by myself. Absolut and water with a hint of mint because I'm using the glass I keep my toothbrush in. Fuck, you bitches better get off work soon.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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