apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
you have a cum towel under your bed, you're the definition of single
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I finished OITNB and broke it off with my fuck buddy in the same day. It's going to be a rough week
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
Randomize
