This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
I'm tired of looking like my mother fucked Chewbacca.
"He didn't answer my snap so I know he's arrested"
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize
