Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.
She's impossible to please. Other than with two fingers and a tongue.
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Is it possible for mice to climb? If so I think mice are climbing into my bed in the night and playing with my hair..
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
