i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
There are thorn wounds on my balls, don't ever question my dedication to party again
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
God I miss you. I would very much like to have sexual intercourse with you. I'm home eating chicken alfredo.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
Randomize
