There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
um i just went through the in-n-out drive thru and meant to ask for my cheeseburger animal style. turns out what i actually said was, can i get that cheeseburger doggy style? been a rough weekend.
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
TSA doesn’t allow handcuffs in carryon bags. Super fun they confiscated them in front of my boss and coworker.
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