things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
she definitely blew him on the riverbank, some lady floated past and said "have some pride honey", amazingly awkward
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Last night when we banged she had nothing else on but socks that said 'property of Jesus' on them.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Randomize