I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
he is fucking friends with his exwife on facebook, but he defriends me after 3 dates? am i that crazy?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
You told me to pour the Gatorade on you "like Flashdance"
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
Randomize
