Bullshit. I know you're watching The Dog Whisperer
That Cesar Milan is captivating
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
Then you got really excited when I upgraded you from puke bowl to puke bucket.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
So he didn't pull out. And I like flipped out. And the he told me to chill and opened up a drawer full of packs of Plan B and handed me one.......
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I knew things were bad when I walked in on you feeding juice to your iPhone
I think a kid would responsible me up
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
