you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
