I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
Randomize
