My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
What did you give her? She's trying to tape her wrists so her hands don't fall off.
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I promise that I won't shotgun beers with your boyfriend this time, Scouts Honor.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
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