windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
How was that my fault?! I made you breakfast and gave you cake, as you asked. Then, you initiated sexual activity.
I had to rub one out before the Shabbat dinner in case I find a nice Jewish girl to fuck me in the bathroom.
Your mother would be so proud
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
All three of the bartenders here have screwed my boss, so he's definitely gay. Unfortunately for you he seems to have a type and you're not it.
Randomize
