let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
Randomize
