How'd it feel making her break her religion?
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
