did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Skipped a towel and decided to spit the cum into his face. I now owe him new contacts.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
If you wake up, and some of your hair is singed off, it probably has something to do with the lit cigarette you put in your hair. You said it could double as a bobby pin...?
Randomize