Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I no longer see him as a simple set of male genitalia attached to a very sexy body. The title "trophy fuck" seems wrong. Damn.
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
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