Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
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