This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
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