I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
OPIZZABONMYDICK
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Randomize
