Yo dont text me then not text me
Did you read the article making fun of the right wing extremists? How they organized this 'tea party', and to propagate it they would mail teabags to their senators? And it became a verb...they had posters saying 'teabag obama!' yeah...
A message to Mrs Obama perhaps?
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
he asked my vagina if she was excited to meet Leonard. LEONARD. His fuckin penis is named Leonard.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
dude I just found tht weird ass guy u invited last night passed out in my closet.... apparently he "couldn't find the exit"
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
