Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
I don't really want to write this paper. It's the last one of the semester - I need to savor the feeling of procrastination.
you told grandpa to call you daddy
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
You don't take my phone while I'm passed out, have a three hour conversation on it with Dealer Dave, set up a date with him and NOT TELL HIM THAT HE'S NOT TALKING TO ME.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
He held the kayak still so I wouldn't tip over while projectile vomiting. If that ain't true love, I don't know what is...
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
