You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
