that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
orgasmnado...tomorrow night
That's what I'm talking about
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
Randomize
