isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
does pizza still have the 5 second rule in the bubble bath?
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Randomize
