Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
In this town being related to a brewing family or the owner of a sports team is like being royalty. It's like hooking up with the queen's nephew or something.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
Randomize
