i got turned down by a girl after she saw how big my penis was and she said "thats not goin in me"
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I don't understand how anyone could look at him and think, 'Yeah, that's a good idea.'
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
Have you fucked anyone in the hospital yet because obviously this illness isnt worth it unless you do. I MISS YOUR HEALTH
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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