Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
He broke his arm in a fistfight with the bouncer. it was neat.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
