im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
nobody understands how my tooth became embedded in the ceiling last night.
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
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