if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I havnt even moved into my new place yet and there's already a county sheriffs card taped to the door with my name on it asking me to call him
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
Randomize
